Stressed? - December 2009 Newsletter

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Snowflakes, Snowmen, Candy Canes.......

Snowflakes, Snowmen, Candy canes, Christmas trees and Gingerbread boys.

M.m.m. ?

You're right! They are cookies!

Today two ladies from our church came and we made cookies and decorated them. Last night I had mixed up the batter and refrigerated it overnight. This morning I made the frosting. When the ladies came, we rolled out the dough, and made the cut-outs, baked the cookies and began the tedious, yet fun chore of decorating the cookies.
What fun we had! We sang Christmas songs along with a CD, we laughed, prayed for a sick church member, had lunch and even sampled a gingerbread man and a candy cane each - without the frosting.

This year our church is giving out a "Christmas Bag" to each child of the church. So this week-end, after the services, each child will be called to the front and given a bag.

You know, when I was a kid, my church always gave each child a gift, and I've never forgotten that. In our last years of Pastoral Ministry, we started that at our church. What delight in the eyes of the children, to think that their church cared enough to give each child a special bag. One year, the church refused to allocate the funds for this, but still I baked gingerbread boys, my dear friend made popcorn balls and another church donated bags to the children of our church. This was "kinda" humiliating for the members of our church to think that another church in the community had cared about our children when our own members did not, but I guess it was a good lesson for them and the children were blessed.

With the advent of the famous "Dollar Store," it's quite easy to delight the children with a minimal outlay of money. What I recall is that my heart was always drawn to my church because they cared.

Are there children in your church who could use a Christmas Bag from you? It's not too late to do it! And you will be blessed when you see the reactions . Let us know if you do it, and how the children responded.

God Bless you and may you have a BLESSED Christmas and Love-filled New Year!

Ron and Nancy

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Countdown to Christmas

Lately I have been going into stores or to a Doctor's Appointment, and seem to be frequently asked, "Are you ready for Christmas?" Am I? I wonder.

Let's see: I have gifts for everyone, except Christopher, but I will get him a gift certificate to a restaurant. He can get a few good meals with that, and single guys ought to like that. Joshua - well he and Bobby are concerns!
Oh yea, Bobby will be starting school (college) soon and perhaps a good backpack would be nice for him. Not sure about Joshus, but I'll check with his Mom.

I have bought all the cookie ingredients I need for the gingerbread boys for the church children, and I have almost all I need, except the fresh food, for the Christmas Eve Family gathering. I have the canned goods put aside for the Christmas basket at church, I have those three pairs of pajamas for the children of the needy family, but I do have wrapping to do yet. And the house needs cleaning after all the baking coming up.

So am I ready for Christmas? Well, in my heart (which is the most important place) I am definately ready for the celebration of the greatest gift ever. The thought that He, a member of the Godhead, was willing to take the form of a baby, live within a young woman for nine months and be born like you and I (well, sort of - a manger is not exactly a clean and sterile birthing room) and carry the issues from the woman who mothered Him and the father who raised Him and then be the sacrifice to insure our salvation - WOW! That REALLY calls for an internal celebration in the hearts of ALL mankind!

You may not have all the gifts beautifully wrapped, the house neat and tidy or the cookies baked, but if you have pondered in your heart the real "Reason for the Season", then you are ready to celebrate with more than fruitcake and tea; you are ready to give your heart to the babe in the manger, to the Sacrificial Lamb, to the King of Kings and Lord or Lords - and that's what really matters!

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Those Less Fortunate

Turkey or Tofurkey, Dressing, Mashed potatoes, butternut squash, (British favorite) -turnips, green bean casserole, sweet potaotes, cranberry sauce or relish, Homemade rolls, Apple, Pumpkin, Tripleberry or Custard Pie. And if you are as blessed as us, Donna's homemade yummy fudge! What a feast!

On the Tuesday before Thanksgiving. it was our privelege to deliver a "Thanksgiving Basket" to a needy family from our church. I couldn't believe what the ladies of the church had bought for that basket! Over the years, I have delivered many a basket, but never one like this. Fresh fruit and vegetables and more than enough fixins' for a dinner fit for a King!

The people who received it were more than shocked! The lady of the house told me that after we left she burst into tears - tears of unbelief and tears of joy!

I remember once in my much younger days when I was still working at a Nursing home as a nurse, I brought home an elderly man who had no family and fed him Thanksgiving Dinner around our family table. Now that was thrilling!

If you've never done something like that, you ought to try it - even if just once. It turned out to be a blessing to our entire family!

With Christmas coming on, consider doing something for those who are less fortunate in worldly goods - the poor, the unemployed, the hungry, the lonely.

We would love to hear your experiences - either from this Thanksgiving or from past Christmas holidays - experiences when you went beyond yourself to bless others. Write them to us in a paragraph, so that we can publish some in our January Newsletter. Send them to nancy@LRInstitute.org.

May God give you inspiring ideas that will be a blessing to others!

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Thanksgiving and Affirmation

I know, it's been a while since a new blog was posted. Call me old and weary and pre-occupied with getting our new room finished ASAP! Well, it's done.

So what do I have to be thankful for this Thanksgiving season? Among our many blessings are each other, our children, grandchildren and great-granddaughter, our friends, our home, our ministry and most importantly a God who is ever-present to comfort, protect, guide and supply our needs.

Thatt's one thing we don't do enough of - we don't praise God for His blessings and thank each other for the ways that love and caring are shown to us. Every day should be Thanksgiving!

At one time, we pastored a church that had some of the congregation who resented affirmation for jobs well done and duties faithfully carried out. We would publicly honor a deacon or elder or treasurer for faithfulness and excellence and would be called down by some for doing so. But we chose then and still choose to affirm and encourage one another as the Bible tells us we should.

Has someone blessed your life? Did they call at just the right time to encourage you? Did they invite you for tea just when you were down and needed a friendly pick-me-up? Did they perform a job well as your employee? Have you noticed a child doing a kind deed or carefully performing a task? Tell them so. Encourage and affirm Lift others up. In so doing, not only will the other person be uplifted, but so will you!

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Will You Give This to My Daddy?

This was sent to me by a friend and I thought it so good, I had to share it with you here.

As a Company, Southwest Airlines is going to support 'Red Fridays.'

Last week I was in Atlanta, Georgia attending a conference. While I was in the airport, returning home, I heard several people behind me beginning to clap and cheer. I immediately turned around and witnessed One of the greatest acts of patriotism I have ever seen.

Moving thru the terminal was a group of soldiers in their camos. As they began heading to their gate, everyone (well almost everyone) was abruptly to their feet with their hands waving and cheering.

When I saw the soldiers, probably 30-40 of them, being applauded and Cheered for, it hit me.. I'm not alone. I'm not the only red-blooded American who still loves this country and supports our troops and their families.

Of course I immediately stopped and began clapping for these young unsung heroes who are putting their lives on the line everyday for us so we can go to school, work and home without fear or reprisal.

Just when I thought I could not be more proud of my country or of our Service men and women, a young girl, not more than 6 or 7 years old ran up to one of the male soldiers. He kneeled down and said 'hi.'

The little girl then asked him if he would give something to her daddy for her.

The young soldier, who didn't look any older than maybe 22 himself, said he would try and what did she want to give to her daddy. Then suddenly the little girl grabbed the neck of this soldier, gave him the biggest hug she could muster and then kissed him on the cheek.

The mother of the little girl, who said her daughter's name was Courtney, told the young soldier that her husband was a Marine and had been in Iraq for 11 months now. As the mom was explaining how much her daughter Courtney missed her father, the young soldier began to tear up ..

When this temporarily single mom was done explaining her situation, all of the soldiers huddled together for a brief second. Then one of the other servicemen pulled out a military-looking walkie-talkie. They started playing with the device and talking back and forth on it.

After about 10-15 seconds of this, the young soldier walked back over to Courtney, bent down and said this to her, 'I spoke to your daddy and he told me to give this to you.' He then hugged this little girl that he had just met and gave her a kiss on the cheek. He finished by saying 'your daddy told me to tell you that he loves you more than anything and
He is coming home very soon.'

The mom at this point was crying almost uncontrollably and as the young soldier stood to his feet, he saluted Courtney and her mom. I was standing no more than 6 feet away from this entire event.

As the soldiers began to leave, heading towards their gate, people resumed their applause. As I stood there applauding and looked around, there were very few dry eyes, including my own. That young soldier in one last act of selflessness, turned around and blew a kiss to Courtney with a tear rolling down his cheek.

We need to remember everyday all of our soldiers and their families and thank God for them and their sacrifices. At the end of the day, it's good to be an American.

RED FRIDAYS ----- Very soon, you will see a great many people wearing red every Friday.. The reason? Americans who support our troops used to be called the 'silent majority'. We are no longer silent, and are voicing our love for God, country and home in record breaking numbers.

We are not organized, boisterous or over-bearing.. We get no liberal media coverage on TV, to reflect our message or our opinions. Many Americans, like you, me and all our friends, simply want to recognize that the vast majority of America supports our troops.

Our idea of showing solidarity and support for our troops with dignity and respect starts this Friday - and continues each and every Friday until the troops all come home, sending a deafening message that.. Every red-blooded American who supports our men and women afar will wear
Something red..

By word of mouth, press, TV -- let's make the United States on every Friday a sea of red much like a homecoming football game in the bleachers.

If every one of us who loves this country will share this with
Acquaintances, co-workers, friends, and family. It will not be longbefore the USA is covered in RED and it will let our troops know the once 'silent' majority is on their side more than ever; certainly more than the media lets on.

The first thing a soldier says when asked 'What can we do to make things better for you?' is...We need your support and your prayers.

Let's get the word out and lead with class and dignity, by example; and wear something red every Friday.

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How Much?

If you thought that last week's blog was cool - miracle colors and all, wait ‘til you hear this one!

When I got to the condo, I discovered a major problem in the master bathroom. There was a hairline crack in the toilet's tank. The water had seeped out and down the back of the tank and onto the wall and floor. The wall surrounding the toilet was mold and mildew. I was horrified, to say the least!
Now here's the corker! The toilet is a rare wall-hung model. They are common in Sun City homes. This was a big complication to the mess!

We have a special insurance on the condo called Service One. They sent a plumber to have a look. He informed me that a new toilet would cost $1000.00! and the insurance would NOT cover it. Something about we needed an up-graded premium plan. "WHAT?" I almost had a heart attack there on the spot! And no Ron to pick up the pieces!. He had to supervise construction at our NM home.

Anyway, then the plumber informed me that if I went to Habitat for Humanity store, I MIGHT be able to find the toilet that would fit, but no guarantee that the toilet I would find - even a wall-hung - would fit where the old one was. And then, what to do about the surrounding wall??

Off to Habitat for Humanity. They had two toilets. "Lord, will you guide me to choose the one that'll fit?" They were $150.00 each - certainly better than $1000.00! I sat there waiting for Ron to answer either his cell phone or the house phone. I waited three hours! Finally an answer. "Get the toilet, and if it fits, it fits!" he said.

Meanwhile Ron was negotiating with Service One and the Plumber over finances. The next day, the plumber returned. When he informed me that he was there to replace the toilet with the one I had bought, I said, "I just may hug you!" But of course, I did not. However, was I thrilled? Beyond words!

Then there was the question of the mildew behind the toilet. I called a handyman, no one I knew, but turned out to be an honest, good guy. He told me how to get rid of the mildew and how to repair the problem myself. No outlay of money for that. YEA!

AND . . . there was the front door knob that needed replacement. I bought a lovely one and proceeded to remove the old and replace, but . . . alas, the Sun City doors require a "special lock" and a wood rasp to make the hole bigger. YUP! I bought a rasp, played carpenter, returned the lock to Lowe's, and went to the only store that carried a lock that would fit the condo's door. They had ONE left, and the locksmith informed me that the company was no longer going to make the kind that would fit. WOW! Was I blessed or what? I would have had to replace the whole door without that last lock!

Floors scrubbed with an electric scrubber, walls, bathroom cabinets and trim painted, new toilet and wall repair, a wall of wallpaper in the Master Bedroom, a new ceiling fan, vertical blinds and door knob and lock later, the condo is transformed, clean and ready for my roommate and her husband. And every step of the way, the good Lord walked beside me!

It's the same thing when we begin the transformation process within ourselves. We meet hurdle after hurdle, and the good Lord smashes through some for us, gives a boost to climb over others, and carries us over the insurmountable ones, all to make us return to the image of Himself within us. What a miracle-working God!

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Miracle Paint

Last week I had an interesting task; I was to paint our condo in Arizona in preparation for renters coming in October 1st. The renters are my roommate from Nurses Training and her husband.

We had discussed color. I wanted to make the three-bedroom condo "interesting" with doing a bit of color. She said that she preferred white or cream in every room - no additional color. "Oh well," I thought, "she's gonna live there so I guess I will acquiesce and paint an off-white or cream color."

A friend there in Arizona had two five gallon buckets of paint that he was not going to use, and offered them to me. The paint was white, he said. So I went to Home Depot to ask how to make the paint a cream color, and was instructed just how to do so. My adopted son, Robbie and I opened a five gallon bucket and added the right color to make cream - at least it looked cream to us.

As we put it on the wall in the guest room, we were shocked that the color was a soft beige/taupe/creamy color - actually very beautiful! We painted the guest room, the master bedroom and the family room that color. By then, we were nearly out of that color. So on to bucket number two.

Robbie had gone home for the night, so I decided I would begin painting the kitchen ceiling with the white of the second bucket, but alas, the paint looked pink! I tried some in the living room - still pink! So I decided to give up until morning, and went to bed early.

In the morning, the painted patch on the kitchen ceiling and in the living room was still pink - but it was a very soft dusty mauve-pink and very pretty. Now the interesting thing is that the kitchen counter is that color and the Kohler sink is too! The living room carpet is dusty rose. So when Robbie arrived and was shocked as I was, we decided to start painting the living room, and I called my roommate to come and look at the color. When she did, she fell in love with it! So.o.o the living room and kitchen are that wonderful "mauvey" color, the master bedroom, guest room and family room are taupey-cream, and the study is "pistachio - the previous tenants had started painting it green.

I'm happy that the condo is not all white, my roommate and her hubby are ecstatic with how it all looks and God gets the credit for painting white and transforming (as He always does with people who are drab and need light) into harmony and beauty! When we allow God to interject His color into our lives, we can become His color, transforming those around us, by the affect that our changes create.

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Laugh As Much As You Breathe

"Laugh as much as you breathe, Love as long as you live"

These are the words inscribed on the beautiful frame that was given to us by our daughters and their families for our anniversary.

The evening of the 15th came along with much excitement this year. On other anniversaries, we have worked or been traveling to a speaking appointment. This year, we had the privilege of being home for the big day. Church was exciting, as our new pastor preached and the service was followed by a luncheon and a special honoring of our 44 years by the "saints." We came home for a short rest, and then got ready for a long awaited evening "out" at a very special place in Ruidoso, New Mexico.

Mountain Annie's is a place that offers special dinners and accompanying theaters performances by well-known musicians. We had heard that the trio of musicians, performing on the 15th were extra special, and we were excited to experience a "dress-up" night out.

When we arrived we spent about half an hour listening to other musicians on the patio, and then time for dinner was announced. We headed into the theater and found our assigned table - table ten. There we were greeted by others at the table who said excitedly, "You two must be the anniversary couple! Look at these things that were brought to the table for you!"

There on the table sat a beautiful bouquet of flowers and a picture frame inscribed with the above words. Propped against the vase of flowers was a tiny envelope labeled, "Mom and Dad." We opened the envelope to read:

"Happy 44th!!! We love and are proud of you and your years together"
Your Girls, Sara & ‘Omi, along with the sons & grandchildren!
XO XO

WOW!!! Our evening began with tears, not laughter, but they were tears of joy - joy and gratitude for the gift that God gave us 41 and 40 years ago - our beautiful girls, and for the gifts of our "sons" and grandchildren along the way.

There has not always been laughter, certainly not continuously, but even in our deepest pain we did find a few things to laugh about, now and then. The older we get, the more we realize that as Art Linkletter often said, "People are funny!" Our responses to the circumstances of life are often comical when we look back on them. How foolish we have been trying to get our needs met; how selfish and me-centered we have behaved. What a waste. Too soon old and too late smart, but better late than never.

So girls and family, you are so right.

"Laugh as much as you breathe, and love as long as you live"- do that which is in the best interest of another, regardless of your feelings. And thank you so much for the gift of your love, so beautifully displayed on our 44th!

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Anniversary

We just celebrated our 44th wedding anniversary. ‘Tis true, we were married on August 15th, the hottest and most humid day of 1965 in New London, Connecticut. All the pictures of me at our wedding show that, ‘cuz my hair frizzed like mad. A new perm and very high humidity caused that!

We look back over these 44 years and feel more like it's been 44 days or maybe 44 minutes - well, we know it's not minutes because it's not humid here and now. We wonder how we managed to survive the first few years of our marriage - they were horrific! Four surgeries and two babies, seven years of put hubby through college, and all of the financial and relational issues that accompanied these events were added to our own personal junk, creating major strains in our relationship!

We've managed, because of grace and mercy, to not just survive, but to thrive during these last 24 years. If you just do the math, you'll discover that it took a while for us to learn what was necessary for personal growth and maturation and for marital restoration. And that's okay, we say, because very seldom does anything worth having, appear instantly! Homemade bread, a beautiful piece of art, a comfortable home and character development - all take time!

Unfortunately, many people suffer for most of their lives and/or their marriages and finally give up - ending up in divorce court, or living quiet lives of misery and discontent. What a waste of two lives. What a poor showing for people of God, who should be demonstrating love and success to the world.

You know other than misery or divorce, there is a third option - fix it! I know, maybe you've tried and you may have even sought out help, but couldn't find solutions. We played that game for years too. One of the major reasons that help seems elusive, is that rather than looking in our own mirror at the image coming back at us, at the attitudes and behaviors that we display, we choose to turn the mirror around and point it at our partners. "If only my wife would . . .," "If only my husband wouldn't . . .". We play the blame game. It's gotta' be the other person's fault; certainly not our's!

Let me tell you something. The hardest and bravest thing you can do to improve your life, your relationships or your attitudes is to finally take a long, hard look in the mirror - It was do or die for us; get a divorce or fix it. Neither of us was interested in misery for the rest of our lives!

The healing process was torture for Ron and I. We really had no guidelines or mentors. But we braved the process that we created, and now we offer that process to those who are sick and tired of being sick and tired.

Take a peek at our offerings here on the website. Binding the Wounds and The Journey are two valuable introspection mirrors - tools for recovery. You need only a couple more people (same sex as you or you and your husband/wife) and the materials, and you set a time once a week for a two hour growing and renewing experience!

And remember, the great key to your success, is looking in the mirror at yourself! Even the Bible tells us that we should "examine yourself," and that's the source of your BEST counsel!

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Always Providing

Ron and I aren't as young as we usta' be! Aches and pains here and there, and the discovery that it takes longer to recover from a fall, a move, unpacking, preparing for a week-long seminar and then doing it, etc . . .

We are now in the mountains of New Mexico and LOVING IT!!! The mornings and evenings are delicious! We can sit on our porch and thoroughly enjoy the stars and the morning birds fluttering about and singing their "welcome to the day" songs. But it isn't all R and R!

We are doing our best to get settled, but that's an interesting project when you're down-sizing too!
Sometimes we need to get some hired help - and of course that comes at a price. On a fixed Social Security income, one can only afford so much. We have a fellow who is going to put up our little addition of a family room/studio, so that we can video some teaching here at our mountaintop spot. That will mean we don't have to drive the 2 ½ hours to El Paso and pay for studio time.


When you're doing a project like this certain "jobs" have to be done prior to the builder's arrival. We had scheduled some help from a fellow who has helped us before, but of late, he has not been really reliable. He comes 1-1 ½ hours late or doesn't call and doesn't show up. Now this creates a real problem! It happened again the last two days he was scheduled.

What to do? How would we find the help we need? Our poor son-in-law, the police officer, is also overwhelmed because he teaches in addition to being a sergeant.

One of our church members heard of our dilemma and suggested that he could find someone for us - and sure enough, a worker showed up today! He was a lovely young man who worked consistently, was easy on our lawn equipment (the other fellow had broken two items) and got the job done precisely. What a blessing to us! He has a regular job with a lumber company, but is willing to work on his days off to help support his family. Now that's a great father and husband!

So once again, we needed not to be apprehensive. The Lord reached over and opened the door precisely when we needed to go through it. At the very right moment, He sent the help we needed.

How grateful we are that we can count on a Heavenly Father who has promised to supply all our needs, and fulfills His promises every time. Always faithful, always on time, and always our needs - probably not our wants, but definitely our needs.

Thank you Lord. You are far more faithful to us than we deserve. Teach us also to be faithful to you and to each other too!

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Grace

Our eldest daughter is a nurse - an Intensive Care Unit nurse. She sees pain and sadness every day that she puts on her uniform and enters the ICU door. I've been an ICU nurse, many years ago when I was still actively nursing, and I know the heartache that can present itself in that unit.

I've also been a patient in ICU, and I know the quality of care that most ICU patients receive. I had top notch care when I was there for two days following neck surgery. - and I wasn't that sick!

Today, our Sara has to deal with not only the most critical heart patients, seniors who have debilitating illness and are coming to the end of their days on this earth, and believe it or not, even patients who are suffering the withdrawal symptoms from drugs or alcohol -the DT's! Because she works in a small, rather rural community hospital, she has a combination of all sorts of patients.

The other day, the poor darling was overwhelmed! Her shifts are 12 hours, plus the additional time it takes to finish charting or pulling all her work together for the next shift. Working four of those days with several very critically ill patients and someone having the DT's is trying, indeed. She was exhausted!

One elderly gentleman gave her the excuse she needed to let out a bit of her overwhelm and exhaustion. His wife had been in ICU for a couple of weeks, hanging on by a thread and on life support. She improved ever so slightly. Bless their hearts, either he or his daughter had been there almost constantly. When she seemed to recognize their presence, her husband stood beside her bed and sang to her - "Amazing Grace." Sara said that it was amazing alright, and it was Grace alone - given to the patient, the doctors and the nurses that had brought her that far.

"How could we not cry, Mom?" she asked.

"Well, I'd be crying for sure," I replied. "And I don't see a thing wrong with it - just shows two things: your exhaustion and more importantly, your soft and gentle heart. I'm proud of you, girl!"

Grace - the unmerited divine assistance of God for the regeneration and sanctification of mankind.

We need a whole lot of it, don't you think?

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Learning

Our new little Mini-Schnauzer girl is learning and teaching us simultaneously! Little Molly is a smart little pup and at the same time endeavoring with all her might to learn how to alert us when she needs an outside potty break. She is learning that these ignorant students of hers (us) have to be told verbally of her need. She comes to wherever we are sitting or standing, stands on her hind legs and gives a hearty "woof-woof" or sometimes a quiet whine. Either vocal alerts us that she needs to "go outside." When we ask her if she needs to "go outside," she replies with an excited "woof-woof-woof!"

This is not an easy lesson for puppies to learn. They have to adapt to a whole different culture than the one they were born into. Let's face it, dogs know very little about indoor versus outdoor plumbing.

One thing they do "get" rather quickly however is eating. Amazing to me that they can figure out the activity of humans eating food versus what it's like for a dog to eat. We certainly don't stick our heads in a bowl located on the floor, but when we are eating, little Molly is "Johnny on the spot" begging to enjoy whatever we have on our plates. We do our best to not give in to her begging. ‘cause we are told by the experts that human food is not great for dogs in most cases - except for some raw veggies and maybe some small amount of fruit. Our Maddie, the schnauzer we lost last summer, was an absolute fiend for bananas. Whenever we would open one, she was at our feet faster than the speed of light! Molly cares not at all for bananas - that we did try.

A few things we certainly can learn from little Molly are:

• When you're tired, flop down for a nap.
• When you're hungry, eat. Don't bother to eat when you're not hungry.
• When you're lonely and you are in need of companionship, seek it out! Go and let someone know that you want to be with them.
• When you want to be held, don't wait ‘til someone invites you. Go to the person you live with and offer and ask for love and attention.
• Give affection whenever you're able or the opportunity presents itself - to the people who you know and love, that is.
• Keep your eyes open and your mouth shut - you learn best that way.
• When you want or need something ask for it. Don't expect people to be able to read your mind.
• Any time you can get the chance to go for a ride, stick your nose out in the fresh air and frolic about , do it. The fresh air, sunshine and exercise will do you good. You'll sleep better!

She has taught us about unconditional love. Even when we have missed her clues and as a result she has used indoors for her potty and is reprimanded, she still offers kisses and affection. She readily climbs on our laps, licks our cheek and nuzzles her snout into our necks.

Oh that we would learn that lesson! Forgiveness and relationship restoration should be that easy!

A Wise Saying

"Pain is God's megaphone to rouse a deaf world." C.S. Lewis said it many a time in his speeches, and it is written at least once in his writings. How wise He was!

Whether it is a 2 AM or 2 PM or any time in between, I've noticed that when I am hurting, I cry out - if only in my mind, "Oh God!." Yes it's true, we do call on Him when we are in pain, don't we?

It's happened to me several times! I remember it well when I crashed a Moped in Bermuda and lay sprawled out in the middle of the road, endeavoring to assess what had happened and if I could move at all. It happened when the pressure cooker blew and scalding potato water burned the skin from my hands and thighs. I remember it again when I had a knee replacement about twelve years ago, and I would sit in the recliner in the middle of the night wondering why I felt so punished. It happened when I faced the surgeon's knife in 2005 for a cervical fusion and fear enveloped me like a blanket of doom. And it's happening now when awakened in the early, early morning hours with stabbing pain in my shoulder from a parking lot fall. Yes, I call out to God and wonder why I must suffer with this at a time when I really need to be getting adequate sleep for all the tasks that lie ahead on a daily basis. But in reality, I know.

You see, it's that in the middle of the night that there's not much to do but write and spend time communing with God. He knows that I need an excuse to sit and ponder, to read, to write, to spend time in quiet pursuits instead of in doing, doing, doing! And maybe having a fall such as I did, is the way to get me to a doctor - I'm so busy doing so much, that I tend to neglect myself.

When people are flat on their backs, the only way to look is up. God knows that and He will make it happen if He knows that ultimately it is in our best interest. That's what love is - A God-given power of choice to do that which is in the best interest of another, regardless of my feelings. To be sure, God ALWAYS does what is in our best interest, even if it hurts Him - or us in the short term.

It is true, Mr. Lewis, and I wish you were still alive to hear me, and others, agree with you. Pain does arouse us. It alerts us mainly to our need for God and it forces us to submit to His control of us and to the loving give and take relationship He offers.

Lord open our ears, will you please, so that we hear your slightest whisper and don't have to be alerted to Your Presence by the screaming siren of pain.

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We Fall Down, We Get Up

Our little Molly has digressed from the perfectly behaved little mini-schnauzer pup to a defiant little girl! What in the world has happened, we ask ourselves. What did we do wrong?

Molly came to us as such a little angel. She seemed to know that outside was for going potty and inside was for playing and snuggling. She has reversed things! This morning at 6:30, I took her out for her early morning duties, and she sat and just looked around at the scenery! Granted, it is very beautiful here, but she has awakened us with her whining, and heretofore that has meant it was time for a bathroom break. Not today. Actually I took her out three different times, and three different times she sat and looked at the scenery or licked the morning dew off the grass. But in-between one of those outdoor excursions, she did her business in the kitchen, where we had her blocked in. WHAT?

I have to admit, it reminded me of humans. We think we get it right, only to discover that somehow we have bungled things up again. Old habits die hard. One song made famous by singer Bob Carlisle (made famous by "Butterfly Kisses"), states,

"We fall down, we get up! And the saints are just the sinners who fall down and get up."

So Miss Molly is still a saint who has fallen down and will get up. I too, am a sinner who falls down much more often than I'd like, but I do keep getting up. Kind of foolish of me to think that a little puppy wouldn't fall down if a grown-up Grandma human does!

The important thing is that when I fall down, God doesn't scold me. He picks me up on His lap, so to speak, and says, "What happened, kid?" Often I have no answer, any more than sweet little Molly does. Is she being defiant or is she just being human like me? - no really, doggie.? I think that she is just being the imperfect little critter that she is, and she'll get up. She'll do what she needs to outside and she'll be the sweet girl she is, inside and outside. She just needs from us the same kind of longsuffering love that God grants to me.

"God, grant us patience with ourselves, with each other and even with our little puppies!"

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Who Do You Trust?

Last week I received an e-mail telling me to NOT accept the new one dollar coins just minted. The reason that it was requested that we reject them, is that the government has removed "In God we Trust" from those coins.

IN GOD WE TRUST. Wouldn't it be wonderful if that was the case?

We have certainly lost trust in our government who is spending our income and the income of our children and grandchildren for generations to come. And what will become of health care and how will we survive tripled utility bills that some are predicting?

We have lost trust in the News Media. Wherever you turn, the news they broadcast is slanted, twisted, told in half-truths, distorted and much of the real truth is eliminated! And then we turn on Fox News and have a heart attack or at least a rise in Blood Pressure - gloom and doom, or is it reality?

We have lost trust in our insurance companies, who change the rules mid-stream and don't bother to inform us until we go to claim some insurance monies at the doctor's office and are told that we don't have insurance. WHAT?

We have lost trust in Credit Card companies who send lovely, complicated letters telling us that our interest rate is going up - no fault of our own, but due to the poor economy. Wait a minute! If the economy is poor, how is raising the interest going to help those who are negatively affected by the economy?

We have even lost trust in doctors. We are afraid that they are being controlled by the insurance companies (like the insurance companies allow eleven minutes for an initial psychiatric exam). How in the world can a doc diagnosis a psychiatric disorder in 11 minutes? And what about those meds they order for us to take. Have you watched the commercials that list the numerous life-threatening side effects of medications?

Truth is, it doesn't really matter if our money tells us that we trust in God or it doesn't. Sure, it is indicative of the state of affairs this world is in, but is it indicative of your state of affairs and mine?

The question is: Is "In God I Trust" written on your heart?

Larry King, Bill O'Reilly, Glen Beck, Hugh Downs and numerous other commentators disclose the gloom and doom facts, but . . . Regardless of what we are told about the world's condition, we can rely on what God has to say:

Psalm 46: "God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though the waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging. . ."

Read the rest of that Psalm. It may be great to memorize it, as you might find it to be a blessing when you feel that all around you is calamity and distrust. God IS the one constant we can trust, regardless of what our money says or doesn't say. Just remember that!

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Lessons From a Pup

Alongside me this morning as I write, sitting in my favorite chair, lies a precious little schnauzer girl - Little Miss Molly. She has attached herself to me, especially when she is tired and needs a nap. I wrote last week about how she curls up in my slippers, and she is still doing that if I am not available, but how she dearly loves to snuggle in my lazy-boy, and be as close to me as possible. She does the same with Ron, but loves to snuggle in his arms. That's quite a sight, ‘cause Ron is not a small man by any means, and she looks so tiny in his arms.

She has become quite the adaptable girl. This last week we had house guests, and she made herself comfortable in their arms too - quickly. She plays tug-o-war, chews whatever she can find, and loves to go outside to explore. She has learned to tolerate the leash, because little "Miss Independent" loved to take off down the driveway, and considering that she is so small and close to the pavement's color, she would be nearly impossible for a driver to see.

She has rapidly learned how to be the boss! It's so cute at bedtime. She has a little bed near ours, and once we have gotten in bed, she wants the light turned off right away. She will whine until we turn it off, or if she doesn't get her way, she places both paws over her eyes to block out the light so she can sleep.

Amazing how much one can learn from a dog!

• She eats only when she is hungry (Isn't that smart?)
  
• She sleeps when she is tired. (m.m.m.)
  
• She knows how and where to get affection and comfort.
  
• She freely gives affection, and so receives it from others.
  
• She trusts the ones who care for her and provide her needs.

Wouldn't we be so much better off if we followed those points?

Molly 'N Me - You Too!

One of the greatest fundamental needs of all human beings is to connect, with self, with others and with a Higher Power. Believe it or not, it's not only humans that need and long to connect; dogs do too.

We have a miniature schnauzer puppy. She is the tiniest, most petite little doll that I have ever seen, when it comes to puppies, that is. She has the typical schnauzer haircut, and looks rather like a well-bred, a.k,c. champion, full grown schnauzer, in very miniature form. Her name is Molly.

Molly has been with us for a week. So she is very new. Just like humans do, when they are in a strange environment with people they don't know, Molly was sheepish on day one. On the long trip home from the breeder, leaving both her Mom, Dad and siblings behind, she slept a lot. Guess that was one way to deal with separation anxiety. She slept on my lap the whole trip, except for ½ an hour when we made a quick stop for something to eat. Then she rested in one of the special carrying cases that one uses for a pet when traveling by airline. She didn't eat much - a couple tablespoons of food, and an ounce or two of water.

Once we got home, she walked around the yard and did her business, and we carried her up the five steps into the house. She slept in a nicely padded kennel, but was a bit fitful that first night - not really happy to be away from her family and in a little kennel. Day one at home she was a bit more animated, but still wanted to be held most of the time, and she got her way - that irresistible little sweetheart.

Day two, she began to warm up in a big way! She was all over the place! She would run around the house, we'd take her out periodically, and then she'd be back in the house and wanting to be on our laps. She learned to climb those big steps in and out of the house in no time, she whined when she wanted to go out, and slowly she began to eat more.

Today it's been a week since we got her. She is very much attached to us both, but we can't just sit holding her. When she realizes that we are busy, she most often looks for my slippers. No, she doesn't really chew them, but she curls up on them for a nap. As I write, that's where she is - asleep with her nose in my slipper. That's her way of being close - connected.

That's how we are. We long to be close too. Each of us has a God-shaped hole in our heart, and while we try to fill it with addictions and other people, still nothing really does the trick as well as the real thing - God. We were created to have the need to be whole. Ever since the incident in the Garden of Eden, humans have been disconnected. The guilt and shame of sin and our wounds have caused the separation. We have been looking to be re-connected now for centuries, and long ago, God provided His Son as the bridge back to relationship, to being whole. Our substitutions for that original connection that we lost way back then, just don't fill the bill like my slippers don't really fill Molly's heart. They are only temporary fixes for the real thing.

I for one, want the real thing! You too?

Weeds

Since moving up to the mountains, I have been having a daily controversy with the weeds. It seems to me, and our neighbor agrees, that you can dig out all the weeds in a given area, come in the house exhausted but delighted that you got rid of the things, and then when you go outside again in a couple of hours, there's a whole lot more weeds where you just weeded! I don't get it. How come they grow really fast but the pretty stuff you plant doesn't?

I will have to say however, that pretty plants put into my little rock garden last year, are really blooming beautifully this year. There were a few weeds there too, but I carefully removed them so that the pretties would show off well.

You know, this reminds me of the human life. I looked up the definition of weed in the dictionary, and believe it or not, what I found is so true of the "weeds" in our experience. The dictionary says that a weed is: "An unwanted plant, especially a wild plant growing where it is not wanted."

I have weeds in my life, and if you're human, I bet you do too. Impatience is one of mine. I want this unpacking to be done and over, but it can't be until we do several things in the house - Like a Master Bathroom shower that needs to be moved to where the huge corner tub is (that we NEVER use) and a lovely cedar lined closet put where the old shower was. And when our addition is completed (isn't started yet) we will have a huge closet for ministry items. It's hard to look at those two trailers that are currently parked in our driveway, and just dream them away - empty!

Another of my weeds is busyness, and unfortunately that one is tied to impatience. It's hard for me to just relax, to sit and write, when I can think of so many other things that I want to do to make our home a restful place. Clutter drives me nuts! So I just keep working at it, endeavoring to find a place for everything and putting everything in its place. All the busyness is tiring, and then it's easy to be short or touchy with others.

So what to do with all these weeds? Just keep plucking them out, I guess. I can spray them with some sort of weed-killer, but they are toxic, and anyway, you end up looking at dead weeds instead of live ones. Is that really any better? And the other thing to do is to plant lovely flowers where there is just plain dirt and weeds. One can do that in the character too. Pluck up the unwanted weeds (behaviors, thoughts, and attitudes) and plant lovely flowers that will give you and everyone who looks on, a lift.

Happy planting!

Memorial Day

Today we remember, that's what a memorial is, a remembrance.

In my cedar chest, I have a treasure from my parents' lives. Medals my father won in high school because of his athletic prowess, certificates of recognition he received during World War II's nightmares in Europe. My father was a medic and a man of great courage and leadership ability during his years in the military. I marvel when I look at pictures of him in his dress uniform and in his everyday military attire. These are simply tangible mementos of his abilities and courage, and the courage of his buddies, some of whom came home and others who did not.

During the same war, his cousin Eric was a Commander in the British Navy. Sometime during that treacherous time, his leg was crushed between two battleships. He recovered and continued his military career for several more years, fighting for our strongest ally and in turn, for us.

I recall my Grandma Scott, who came to America from England during World War I, traveling on a cattle ship. Along with her came her mother and her great aunt. Talk about courage to travel 3000 miles in embattled waters, for the privilege of experiencing the opportunities and freedoms that could be found by immigrating to the United States. My Grandfather (not then married to Grandma) had already come and contributed his weaving expertise to the New England textile mills. Many British came, many Germans and Italians came, to find a better life in a new world. Most of them came through Ellis Island in New York, past the famous Statue of Liberty "Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free . . ."

I remember my Mother telling of one of the horrors of war while my father was overseas. Just across the street from their duplex, was a small grocery store. Each day one or two uniformed military would enter that store, find out the location of an address they held on official U. S. Government papers, and would then walk or drive to those addresses, delivering messages of gloom, injury and death to wives or parents of loved ones serving our country. Each day my mother prayed that the knock would not come to her door. It was not only the men in uniform who suffered, but the wives and parents who waited and hoped for the war to end.

I remember Vietnam and its incredible atrocities, 9/11 and the terror on our soil, and the resulting conflict in Iraq. Memories are stories of the heart and mind, symbols of days gone by, sometimes hidden away until some stimulus from the present brings them vividly before us again. Memorial Day is such a stimulus!

On this day of remembering please recall with us the greatness of our country for which these men and women fought, the liberties they sought to defend and the leaders who were worth following. Perhaps our remembering and our prayers will reawaken sleepy pride in our land and rekindle some sort of determination to keep our country great enough to fight for and true to its founding principles and its God.

Blessed Rain

Today has been one of the nicest mountain days we've experienced so far! It rained!

About two weeks ago, we were headed to town on an errand that needed to be done. As we rounded the corner out of our subdivision, we saw plumes of smoke and orange flames shooting into the air from about 50 yards ahead. Now that's a moment that takes your breath away! Here in the mountains it has been dry. Yes, there was snow this winter, but not enough for the forest to remain sufficiently moist enough to discourage wild fires. Unfortunately, added to the dry conditions are the destructive behaviors of some folk who love to see fire and perhaps the devastation it causes, so they deliberately start the flames. That fire had been set.

Fifteen minutes later, we called our daughter who lives about three blocks from us, to inform her of the situation. "Oh yes, I know," she said. "There it goes again! A huge plane has been dive-bombing overhead - I think it is spraying fire retardant. There are a couple of helicopters buzzing overhead too. I just talked to hubby (a police sergeant) and he said they aren't letting anyone into our sub-division, so you'd better call me before you try to come back home," she warned.

Yesterday afternoon, Ron and I decided to take a break from the unpacking and other work, to take a ride for gas in our putt-putt (glorified golf cart). When we went outside, we could smell smoke. The eastern skies were filled with the stuff. One of the neighbors told us that the fire was in Arabella, a town about 30 miles from us, but the wind was carrying the smoke our way.

By the time we got home, an hour later, the smoke had greatly lessened, but I was in trouble! Dry smoky air and traveling pollen and allergens had hit me with a vengeance! I had been battling a mild cold, but with the addition of these irritants, I went into an allergic reaction like I hadn't had for years!

A quick hop into the shower, Benadryl and an herbal anti-allergy medication finally settled down the reaction. Today, things are considerably better. Many prayers for rain have brought moist relief to the mountains, and the deer are visible in abundance, drinking in the welcome moisture from the wet grasses. God has sent a gentle, misty rain that has lasted most of the day and evening, and everyone is rejoicing. Probably the visitors on motorcycles aren't too happy, as their festival is being dampened, but the residents of our community are breathing easier tonight! We expect another rainy day tomorrow.

Showers of blessings! Everyone benefits: Allergy sufferers, forests, forest animals, the fire departments in the area, residents whose fears of the next fire are being quieted, and certainly all of us who have prayed for this moisture, preserving fauna, forest and homes. Showers of blessing, indeed!

The Touch of God

Have you ever felt totally exhausted, overwhelmed and wondered where the energy would come from for one or two more activities? Well, that's just where we were a few days ago!

As you know, we moved a couple of weeks ago - truck, trailer and car. Behind, we left items that couldn't fit into our traveling vehicles, in the garage, and that faced us after endeavoring to unpack, spending four days preparing for EIDO, making the trip to Washington State, making the necessary purchases and then teaching for six long days. Then there was a bit of counseling yet to do, and finally the return trip. We had planned to drive to Phoenix, pack up the remaining items in our flatbed trailer, and then drive to El Paso, pick up the Pacifica parked at the airport where we left it to go to Washington, and then three hours up the hill to home.

After finishing EIDO, we decided we would postpone that trip to Phoenix and head straight home, endeavoring to get a little rest before the last leg of the move. We called our friends to let them know that they didn't have to worry about overnight guests, and got the surprise of our lives!

Kenny had taken his son and his worker to our garage. He had built sides for our trailer, and packed it completely with all the leftovers. WHAT??? He would do that for us?? Yes!

So again we changed our plans, and got off the plane in Phoenix. Ken and Donna met us at the airport, took us home for a cool, light supper, gave us the beautifully appointed guest room for the night, a delightful breakfast in the morning, and then sent us on our way to El Paso and on to home.

What kind of friends would care that much to take the risk, pack up someone else's "stuff" and surprise them with the greatest gift ever? Friends who love you and want the best for you; friends who know you well enough to know that you'd be exhausted after a move and a lengthy seminar, friends who know that you have enough challenges and want to lighten your load, friends who listen to God and respond to His voice.

So yes, Kenny, Donna, Robbie and Mario - you loved, you cared, you listened, and you cannot believe how loved we feel! The relief that the necessary move has been made is beyond thrilling.

Thank you seems so insipid - yet it seems to be all we can say. YOU ARE LOVED!

And now, on to more of the unpacking!

The Move

So . . . the move has occurred and we are in our mountain home - well almost!

Our place is currently decorated with cardboard and plastic boxes dotted amongst the furniture. There are piles of things yet to be placed where they should go, and in some cases, there are not sufficient places for those things. Yes, we are downsizing, but even having done a lot of that, it's not quite enough! We have moved from approximately 2100 square feet to 1568. It's a tight squeeze! We do hope to add on a family room/studio, but that'll be when we have sufficient funds to do so! It will allow us to film things at home rather than flying east or driving 2 ½ hours one way to a studio and then paying for studio time. In the long run, it'll pay dividends both in energy and saved money, but to begin with, it's an outlay of cash we don't have!

Thank God we have wonderful friends. Kenny, Donna, Deb and Doug helped with packing and loading the truck and trailer. Our children and church family and Donna (who drove with us for company and to help for 5 days) helped to unload on this end. Donna was an unbelievable help! I bet she is still exhausted and attempting to relax at home.

Things surely do change as time goes on. Twenty years ago probably everything would be in its place already, but one week of being here has not been sufficient to empty boxes, build shelves and place things where they need to be. Our backs and legs ache and we wonder if we'll ever be "normal" again!! We try to work a bit and then rest a bit, but that just slows down the process, doesn't it?

Sometimes I think it's a bit scary to be feeling my age, and other times I am thankful that I am not a teen or even in my thirties in these times we are experiencing. I think about how grateful we are to be near our children and grandchildren, to watch them mature and experience their accomplishments. Abby (age 14) sang in a spring concert at her school. She shined especially when she did her solo, while both grandmas and her parents cheered her on and delighted in her flawless performance. Hannah (age 9) came to the house and saw Donna and me putting the legs on our dining room table and asked, "Are we coming here to have dinner with you tonight?" Bless her heart; you couldn't see the fridge for the boxes! The day before, she had been a real champion mover!

So as the boxes slowly disappear and the place begins to look like home, I shall thank the good Lord for the mountain home He has provided and the friends we now miss who helped us to move, and the family nearby who bring love into our hearts and home.

Spring

Spring has sprung - in some places anyway.  This weekend, we took a ride with some friends and in three hours passed through rain, sleet, snow, sunshine and a beautiful rainbow.  Having experienced various weather conditions in such a short span, we took the rainbow as God's promise that spring is definitely on its way - as usual!  This year it just seems to be taking its time. 


 
Every year about this time, daffodils, crocus, singing birds and tulips here and there announce that the deadness of winter is being replaced again by new life.  Delicate light green new leaves sprout on what looked like dead branches and folks begin to spend time planning their plantings for the summer.

Me too!  I've been thinking about the little garden near the main entrance of our mountain home.  I drew it on a napkin as we flew home from a seminar last week, and pictured the colorful blooms surrounding our three wooden bears - Mama, papa and baby. Our butterfly bushes are hopefully springing to life again, and I look forward to the winged activity that surrounds them when the blooms appear.  Our Blue spruce trees will have their soft new growth in a couple of weeks, and the large cedar beside our hillside driveway will have a bench placed beneath it and perhaps a few flowers that do well in shade planted nearby.  I hope to plant something nice in three huge pots we will take from Arizona to the mountains, so that there will be some color on our deck. We sit there in the cool early morning with our cups of hot tea - our special time of the day to enjoy the crisp, clean air, plan our day and listen to the sounds of the nature that surrounds us.


 
There is something very special about each season, but spring has an emotional component that is different than the other three seasons. It's a time of hope, of birth, of reassurance that God is in His heaven and all is right with the world.  Even in this time of strife everywhere, there's something about a cheery daffodil, a pansy's perky face and the sweet chirping of birds who have been away or hiding for the winter, that says to me that God is still in charge, the seasons change on time, life springs even thru the winter's snow and God will still take care of his children.
 
It can be easy to get discouraged listening to and watching the news. Fears for the future can pop up out of nowhere, just like the crocuses through the snow.  But if you find yourself in that state - wondering what will become of the world around us and the people in it, just go out in God's glorious fresh air, find some spring flowers, and be reminded that God is still in control.

Losses and Blessings

Ever noticed how when something really negative occurs, something positive is sure to follow? Ever notice how when something is taken away from you, somehow entirely different other blessings arrive on your doorstep?

I've been feeling rather "down" lately. Life as we have known it for the past ten years is taken a giant turn. The friends I love and hold so dear are going to be miles away from me, the quick trip to the grocery store (my favorite place to roam up and down the aisles when anxious or overburdened, is going to be miles away now - like 15 - instead of 3 blocks away. The kitchen we had renovated and decorated in shades of a beautiful mellow green, will be left behind, with my wonderful double ovens (something I had dreamed about owning for years) are, of course, going to be left behind as well.

I've discovered already, that the older we get, the harder it is for change to take place. Rest assured however, we are going to a beautiful spot. The weather couldn't be nicer, and being near our daughter and her children will be great, but still, the change, the packing, and the deciding what to sell, what to pitch and what to keep is challenging!

I was having what one could call a meltdown the other day. I was packing some things in my lovely kitchen, and the tears were flowing. My mother had given us a small amount of money and it was used for the kitchen. Somehow, that room represented her, and the connection of the loss of her and the loss of the kitchen became muddled with each other.

And then the blessings arrived! Ron, who was working in the study, just arrived in the kitchen, put his arms around me and literally hugged me with his heart. He asked what the real problem was, and the dam let loose. That was OK with him - he just let me weep until I could explain. I then decided to take a break from the kitchen and catch up on my e-mails. There was an e-mail from a pastor we had done seminars for years ago. He reported on two wonderful stories of success following his members completing the recovery program. There was another from another country, where current success is occurring far beyond our wildest dreams.

There they were - three wonderful heart-felt blessings to make me understand that our marriage and our work are far more important and impacting than our momentary losses.

As you struggle through the effects of these difficult economic times, look for the blessings that the good Lord pours on you with one hand while the times in which we live and the circumstances of life seem to take away with the other.

How Much For This

Have you ever conducted a tag, yard, garage or moving sale? Did you find it to be a fun experience?

Today was the first day of a two-day event, but we aren't so sure that it'll take two days to sell everything! The huge signs around the neighborhood said that we were going to be open on Thursday and Friday from 8 AM to 3 PM. However, people began to arrive at 7 AM. Perhaps where we live is the Yard or Moving Sale capitol of the world, I am not sure, but I do know that the folk here are great enthusiasts for such events! WOW, they are serious about this sale business!

It took us about three weeks of packing and sorting - not full time, mind you, because we are still teaching and writing and conducting the work of Life Renewal Institute. With the help of two very precious friends, we've been able to spend a couple of hours here and there, and in the last three days, we spent probably 4-5 hours of sorting, boxing, pricing etc.

Well, it's about 4 PM on Day One of the sale. I am in my recliner (a Yard Sale find) that has a vibrator in the lower back area. My feet are propped up, and Baby, am I ever grateful for my yard sale find! My legs are screaming, but know what? Tomorrow's sale is off! We still have a few more things (mainly books from our vast library, but the bookcases are gone! I think we'll wait until after our Portland, Oregon event to have another sale. Who knows? By then there will probably be more "stuff to sell!

I suppose that in this economy, folks are looking for a steal on anything. Items priced at ten cents went as fast as pricier items. The 25 cent items flew off the tables!

Sometimes it takes a while to prepare for an event - a wedding, an anniversary, a special celebration - and before you know it the day is over, Been thinkin' that it's that way with life! Just about the time you think you've finally grown up, the gray hairs and creaky limbs appear. Sometimes you wonder why you never did the things you wanted to do before the aches and pains of maturing age hit ya', but at least you've got those retirement years to do some of what you wanted. If you're one of the lucky ones that the financial meltdown has not affected too drastically, praise God for your blessings. Hop on a golf cart or in your car, and go a-tag-sale-in'. See what bargains you can find, meet some of the nicest people in the world, and thank your God in Heaven for the little things in life!

Disappointments

Everyone experiences them. They are somewhat devastating when they happen, but why do they and how should we respond to them? I suppose a good percentage of the intensity of our reaction depends on the depth of the disappointment and how it affects your life. In our long years of life, we have come to realize that many of them, or maybe all of them, happen for a reason and are divinely appointed.

Just after the holidays, we were scheduled to leave NM and head back to Phoenix for a day or two and then on to a speaking appointment in Florida. On the day we were to leave NM, it began to rain cats and dogs - no really phone calls - and in the middle of all the calls, we endeavored to check on our flight to verify departure and arrival times. That's when the terror hit!

The airline that we always use had no record of our booking the needed flights. We even asked a friend to check the place in our office where we keep our reservations, and no information about the needed flight was there! We checked the credit card records - nothing! We were in an incredible mess. Add to that the fact that we had enjoyed house guests from the 23rd until the 4th of the succeeding month, and much energy had been expended there, so we were a bit weary. I was endeavoring to pack the appropriate items for that particular appointment plus whatever we would need for the next five weeks of absence from home - traveling to appointments.

Finally, when everything possible had been checked we checked with the airlines to find a price for the needed flight. UGH! Nowadays, you book in advance, or it's "socked to ya'!" You can be sure that we were disappointed - or more like devastated! So.o.o. what to do?

Suddenly a thought came to me. Instead of jamming all of the packing and planning into one day and then hitting the road for an 8 hour drive back to Phoenix, unpacking the car, packing for our appointment and rushing to the airport, why not stay here (since we had to book another flight anyway) and fly from here rather than from Phoenix. We looked at each other in shock as the words came out of my mouth, and then breathed a corporate sigh of relief. We could "cool it."

So that's just what we did. You know, the older one gets, the wiser it is to do just that - cool it. Recognize that most disappointments work out as well or better in the end, and in many of the cases, there is a hidden blessing to be enjoyed.

I guess the old saying, "If life gives you lemons, make lemonade," is a valid and smart one!

Pears n Pairs

After a lengthy absence from home, beginning the end of January, I went to the office and noticed that my calendar was still on January. As I turned the page to pass February and land in March, I noticed that my February calendar, entitled "Flavors of Life," had a giant picture of a pair of pears on the February page. How coincidental - or was it?

We have spent the last four seminars ministering to pairs - to couples. In this picture, two Bosc pairs sit on a table, surrounded by their leaves. The left pair, slight larger and taller than the right one, leans toward the other with it's top curled slightly over it's companion pair in a protective stance. The right pair leans into the embrace. These two pears do indeed, look like a human pair, snuggled to each other. What a profound picture.

God did create first the male, the stronger of the two, to be provider, protector and priest. And when He saw that it was not good for man to be alone, he created a "helper suitable for him" to be the concerned, compassionate caregiver. Amazing how this picture on my calendar seems to depict that.

As we have dealt with couples here in the US, the Czeck Republic, Russia, the islands of the Caribbean, Singapore and in Guam and England, we have discovered that the issues they confront are not appreciably different from each other. The issue of selfishness raises its ugly head everywhere, and to be sure, each individual brings into their relationship, the issues that they carry from previous generations in their own families. He brings his junk, she brings hers and together they make more of the same.

How in the world do we get around this? We DON'T! We have to go headlong, straight through it. We have to look at our beginnings, going back in previous generations as far as we can to find and then acknowledge the trash that has been handed to us. Of course, we wade through that to discover the good we received, because there's always some of that. And then each one in the couple must do the work of removing the emotional charges from their old memories. This will guarantee that her junk doesn't affect him and visa versa.

There's a process to help you do that work - thought you might like to know. Actually there are three choices:

a 22 session recovery program

a scientific and more complete approach to emotional healing (4, 10-session segments)

This one's been out a while, but is still effective.

So if you want your marital picture to look like the pair of pears, and it currently doesn't, may we suggest the above restitutional programs?

Don't Do What We've Done

Paper, paper everywhere - and much more stuff to shred! My Grandmother's stuff, my parents' stuff and ours! It's just too much when one finally comes to downsizing and packing to move.

We have had a storage room off of our garage, where we have kept files and files of not-needed and now definitely unwanted papers of all types. You don't want to know how many bags of shredded paper our poor garbage man has had to haul off- unbelievable. There was just NO WAY we were going to cart it all to our smaller house that does not have a garage nor a storage room, and is in itself, much smaller than our house here.

Reminds me of the stuff of our lives that we keep and just don't need to! Of course there are precious, treasured memories, that we hope we'll never loose, but there are other experiences and thoughts and feelings that we need to shred and put in some never-to-be-looked-at-again landfill, far away!

After all of the research that we have done about the human mind and it's power, we believe that those long ago, should-have-been-trashed memories, that are filled with the accompanying emotion, slow down our thinking and create glitches in our recall and thought processes as we age. We believe that many seniors loose awareness and memory because there's too much "paper" (recorded memory and emotions) junking up the brain, just like the unwanted paper has cluttered our storage room and study.

You know, one of the finest thing we can do for seniors, is to get them to talk about the past - their lives, their loves, their pain, their regrets. That's like helping them to identify unneeded paper and shredding it, making things ever so much simpler. Maybe, before you are a senior, you should start talking or writing about some of your memories. It's the painful ones that drag us down, because the accompanying negative emotions pull us toward sadness, anger, fear and a host of other negative emotions.

Moral of this blog - start shredding NOW!

It's Everywhere

We are in Sun City, the retirement capitol of the world! Many people play golf here on one of the MANY courses, and most people, whether or not they play golf, own a golf cart. They are fun open-air vehicles that don't go much faster than 30 mph, and can be used on most streets here in town.

Yesterday Deb and I decided to go for a ride - fresh air, sunshine and all that! We had some rolls left over from the previous supper, and decided to donate them to the ducks at one of the local ponds, so off we went.

When we arrived, we were swarmed by pigeons, who I suppose thought that they were going to get the hand-out, but we had our minds made up - this bread was for the ducks! As we approached the water's edge with our bag of goodies, the ducks swam quickly to greet us, hoping that our sack contained their snack.

After that fifteen minute experience, we have decided that the ducks are no different from humans in their need to be first, their selfish greed and their eagerness to do whatever it takes to get ahead!

Two black ducks seemed to be standing on top of the water as they fought each other over a few crumbs. They snipped and bit each other, and the battle finally ended when one ducked under the water and bobbed up elsewhere. But that wasn't enough for the aggressor, who quickly paddled to where his partner had popped up, to snip and bite at him again!

One brown duck, who Deb's granddaughter had named "Peanut Butter" was a target of much jealousy, as Deb tried, almost in vain, to see that Peanut Butter got her fair share. Two other brown ducks attacked, attempting to chase her away from the landing bread scraps.

There was one pure white duck on the pond in the midst of beautiful iridescent purple and green headed mallards. "Whitey" seemed to shrink back, reticent to swim forward within reach of the bread. This was the shy duck, more interested in harmony with the others than in eating himself.

Most swam as fast as possible to bread scraps landing in the water from the shore. They would circle and dive for the bread as for lost treasure. Actually, the scene was reminiscent of a football game's big tacle or a parade, where candy is being thrown to the bystanders from people on a passing float.

"I want, I want, Gimmee, That's mine!, Me first, It's my turn." Ever watch a group of people wanting to be the first to board a plane or a train or a bus? It's as if the world will come to an end if they aren't first to board.I guess it's about survival, but are we so self-centered and selfish, that we, like the ducks, don't care who we hurt as long as we get "it" first and make sure that what we do get is the BEST? Do we step on others to get to the top?

Watch people for a week or two, and write in with your thoughts. See how many "Whiteys" you can find in the crowd versus the others who will do whatever they can to get "the bread."